The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @texttheater ever

March 14th, 2017

4Ever_Waiting Food isn't allowed in the living room. His tablet isn't allowed in the kitchen. He beat the system. I quit. 😶 pic.twitter.com/6k0HONH3ED

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 9:52 PM, Mar 14th, 2017 via Twitter for Android)

XplodingUnicorn 4-year-old: Can I use your office chair?

Me: I'm using it.

4: You're not spinning.

Me: I don't want to spin.

4: You're using it wrong.

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 9:51 PM, Mar 14th, 2017 via Twitter for Android)

"All you have to do to finish this track is hold the forward key." youtu.be/FPMOPgTnOFY via @YouTube

via Twitter Web Client

the_maki Went in and didn't. pic.twitter.com/HiNcZBlGaq

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 7:13 PM, Mar 14th, 2017 via Twitter Web Client)

amyquispe Why Is Silicon Valley So Awful to Women? theatlantic.com/magazine/archi…

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 6:37 PM, Mar 14th, 2017 via Twitter Web Client)

girlposts The word 'nun' is just the letter n doing a cartwheel pic.twitter.com/jbAtIvto7T

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 6:36 PM, Mar 14th, 2017 via Twitter Web Client)

ReformedBroker no...no way...NO WAY! NO! Yes! YEEEEESSSS!!!

pic.twitter.com/ERmn0MN6qz

via Twitter for iPad (retweeted on 6:04 PM, Mar 14th, 2017 via Twitter for Android)

@ojahnn From their perspective or ours? Are we facing them or seeing them from behind?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to ojahnn

@plomlompom Ach, komm. Der Artikel ist zwei Jahre alt und mir ist, wenig überraschend, kein ernsthafter Einwand bekannt.

via Twitter for Android in reply to plomlompom

SPIEGELCaptions Taliban-Trainingslager an der afghanisch-pakistanischen Grenze: Rüstzeug fürs Leben

via SPIEGELCaptions (retweeted on 1:28 AM, Mar 14th, 2017 via Twitter for Android)